By now, you've heard The Kindly Ones performing a song called "Noonweh," a catchy number with a bizarre, sing-a-long chorus.

"Who the $%^# is Okhaga?" you might ask. "What does H'eon, K'eon, Noonweh (Noonweh) mean?" and "Why is this song so important?" (I'm so glad you asked!). Read on and discover the truth, and how it could change your life!

Once there was a god called Okhaga, who was the Iroquois God of the South Wind. He was very important to the Iroquois people because his influence drove away the winter and helped the crops grow. However, times changed and Okhaga found himself out of work. After all, who's gonna pray to the South Wind when there's Central Air available? So Okhaga had to find another job.

One day, he realized that there were many people driving cars around town and very few parking spaces. He saw people grumbling and swearing as that cursed Mini Cooper stole the sweet spot they just saw. All that desire for a place to park their SUV's turned to frustration as the only space they could find was too small for them to fit ("Curse you, black-hearted Mini Cooper driver!"). So Okhaga decided he would become the God of Good Parkma (that's good karma in the parking lot, in case I'm losing ya).

By now you're probably wondering, "Hey, I own a car! I could use some of that Good Parkma. How do I get it?" (You're good at asking these questions!).

It's very simple. When you're in your car, one person sings out "H'eon K'eon Noonweh!" and your friends respond with "Noonweh!" (Go watch The Kindly Ones onstage to learn the proper technique). That's all you need to make your driving life easier.

Just remember:

Call: "H'EON, K'EON NOONWEH!"

Response: "NOONWEH!"

Thanks to Phil Mckordic and Johnny Westgate.

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