Transactional Analysis is a theory of personality
and a systematic psychotherapy for growth and personal change.
Introduction:
The goals of TA can be described as two fold:
Eric Berne, borne in 1910, in
Montreal, Canada, was a pioneer and a radical in the field of psychiatry. Berne
died July 15,1970, aged only 60 years
of age. He left behind him a profound and systematic theory of personality and
a range of tools which have been used throughout the world to promote health
and growth. Berne's best known work is Games People Play (1964), an
international best seller which has altered the way every day people think and
how they understand relationships. The idea of the inner Child, of Games, and
of Strokes and Life Scripts are now widely used terms far outside of the TA
community, and have entered everyday language.
Another terrific book was published after his
death... "What do you say After you say Hello" summarizes much of his
theory and his latest developments of TA theory. The book opens with 4
questions:
These questions are answered in an enjoyable and
profound way throughout his work.
The contrast between autonomy... and independence is often used to illustrate the way that transactional analysts think. Autonomy is where an individual is in tune with themselves, others and their environment and is acting freely, thus may be described as being Script free. This is in contrast to individualism or independence in which the person is acting within their dysfunctional life script, maintaining a belief that others are not Ok.
Berne
was trained in psychoanalysis, and he developed Transactional Analysis. First
writing about TA in the 1950's, he continud to develop his theory and practice
till his death.
·
TA.
uses a cognitive approach in teaching clients the concepts being used. TA. is
interactional in analysing the transactions within their social context.
·
TA.
works with the affect, helping people let go of their ‘old’ feelings and
expressing their emotions in the here and now.
·
TA.
is contractual in its approach. This contractual approach is one of the
differentiating markers which defines TA from other psychotherapy approaches.
Berne describes people as basically being OK.
However, in their early life they make decisions, which
leads them to the not OK position or a position of believing others are not OK
(or both). He talked of the OK ‘PRINCE’ and the not OK ‘FROG’.
"OKness" can be described as having intrinsic worth and value.
Berne believed that every person:
·
Can
change.
·
That
people are responsible for their own lives.
·
That
everyone is born OK.
These can be seen as the first principles of TA and
profoundly effect the way Transactional Analysts operate in their practice.
Berne started in analysis with Paul Federn in 1947,
later he became the analysand of Erik Erikson. Both of these analysts
influenced Berne’s theoretical development of ego states.
STROKES:
Berne 1971: “A
stroke is a unit of recognition”.
Woollams and Brown: (Transactional Analysis 1978)
“A stroke is a unit of attention which provides stimulation to an
individual”.
Physical
stimulation is a basic human need (This is supported by research (Spitz 1945) -
in this research it was noted that children deprived of physical stimulation may
sink into decline and become prone to death.) Berne described this as stimulus hunger.
As
we grow and develo, our stimulus hunger develops and is partially transferred
to a psychological version which Berne describes as recognition hunger.
·
Therefore a working definition of a stroke is a transaction which
provides a person with either recognition or stimulation.
It
appears that it matters little whether this recognition or stimulation is
positive or negative. E.g. the child who is naughty in order to ‘gain attention’ rather
than being ignored.
It
should be noted therefore that ‘attention seeking behaviors’ have value for
those who are behaving in that way. It is important to give them attention.
THE STROKE ECONOMY
In the book “Scripts People Live” (1974) Claude Steiner, a close friend of Berne, develops this theme.
The
stroke economy describes how society has developed a system to control and
compete in the giving and receiving of strokes.
Steiner
writes the wonderful story of “The Warm Fuzzy Tale”. In this story he tells how
a happy family freely gave warm "fuzzies" until a wicked witch
deceived them by telling them that their warm fuzzies will run out.
The
family started to hold back from giving warm fuzzies, and as this spreads
through their community people’s backs start to shrivel up, and people start to
die. As the witch wishes to sell her salves and potions she doesn’t actually
wish people to die, so she invents cold pricklies, and plastic fuzzies which
keep people alive and unhappy so that they carry on buying her potions and
salves from her.
However,
the children eventually learn that they won’t run out of the warm fuzzies, and
so start giving them away freely again inviting the adults to join them.
TYPES OF STROKES
·
INTERNAL:
fantasies, self praise, and other forms of self stimulation.
·
EXTERNAL:
strokes from others are important for healthy living.
·
CONDITIONAL:
the stroke is for something - “I like your coat”.
·
UNCONDITIONAL:
the stroke is for being you - “I love you” (POSITIVE: “I love you” NEGATIVE: “I
hate you”.)
·
STROKE
VALUE: “I love you” will carry more energy say 10, whereas “Hi” may only carry
say a value of 2.
·
FILTERED
STROKES: “I see you have a new coat” can be changed / filtered to negative or
positive strokes with the person saying to himself “He likes / doesn’t like my
coat”. The person maintains his own internal life position by using his filter.
STROKING PROFILE
The stroking profile helps to measure how a person gives and receives strokes in 4 categories. This can be an effective therapeutic tool as a person can then decide to change any part of his/her stroking profile. E.g. a person may decide to stop discounting positive strokes and to ask for more of them.
·
GIVING
STROKES IS OK
·
SAYING
NO IS OK
·
TAKING
STROKES IS OK
·
ASKING
FOR STROKES IS OK
1.
Rate yourself in each of the categories above as to how often you do these
things.
2.
Do above for both positive strokes and negative strokes.
3. NB
that all transactions are strokes.
Once
you have completed this you could then consider how you wish to change and in
which direction. The aim is to develop the areas in which you have a low score
rather than reducing the areas in which you have a high score. (The stroking
profile was first developed by Jim McKenna and was described in the
Transactional Analysis Journal, October 1974.)
A
simple way of rating how many strokes you exchange with significant others in
your life.
List
the people / situations in which you spend most time and rate the exchange of
strokes. What you are checking here is the balance of positive and negative
strokes and ask your self “With whom do I want to spend most of my time?” This
is a good exercise for families and teams, also looking for burnout scenarios.
Berne described how we structure our time in order to gain strokes
and to meet our need for structure... we all have a drive or need to structure
our lives.
As you move through the different ways of spending time from 1-6
(below), the level of strokes exchanged increases.
Awareness of time-structure can give people extra options in
choosing how they will use their time in order to gain the strokes they need.
E.g. the married couple who spend all evening together watching TV
and then move into a game to avoid going to bed together. They gain strokes
through the fight rather than through the more demanding intimacy.
They may decide to engage in some activity (e.g. talk and walk
together!) in order to ‘stroke’ each other more during the evenings and so
avoid the need for a game, opening the way possibly for intimacy.
6 WAYS OF STRUCTURING TIME:
l. WITHDRAWAL:
Entering into one’s own private world, only
internal fantasy strokes are available.
2. RITUALS:
“Hi there” “How are you”
3. PASTlMES:
“Ain’t it awful” “Have you seen?”
4. ACTIVITIES:
Group activity such as playing football,
with strokes frequently given according to
performance.
5. GAMES AND RACKETEERING:
Transactions with ulterior messages.
6. INTIMACY:
Strokes are freely given and spontaneous
with material from all three ego states being available. There are no ulterior
transactions or motivations.
Ego states are a consistent pattern of thinking, feeling and behaviour.
It
is the concept that each person has the potential for three fully functioning
ego states that separates TA. from other approaches.
There
are two basic models of ego states, these are the STRUCTURAL MODEL and the FUNCTIONAL
MODEL.
There
has been and still continues to be much debate regarding the relative merits of
these two models and much of this debate has been of the nature “What did Berne
really mean?” The functional model is the one widely known in a simplified form
and is often used as an explanation of what TA. is. These simplistic
explanations are often misleading, but it is worth mentioning however that both
models have value.
In
order to differentiate between the two, remember the following:
STRUCTURE ..... Refers to the building, i.e. what is in the ego states, what are
they? And how are they made up?
STRUCTURE = CONTENT
FUNCTION ..... This is a description of their function and of their respective
ways of behaving.
Also remember that both these models are often talked about as if they are real entities, whereas they are both models used in order to explain and to facilitate our understanding of people.
Berne
described four ways of diagnosing which ego state a person is in:
·
Behaviourally:
words, posture, tones, gestures and facial expressions will all give clues as
to which ego state the person is in.
·
Social:
in interactions the other person will respond from an invited complementary ego
state giving a clue to the first person’s ego state.
·
Historically:
how things actually were confirms the diagnosis. Were you like this when you
were ....?
·
Phenomenological:
Berne describes this as the times when, in the here and now, a person actually
re-experiences exactly a past event.
ADULT EGO STATES
Your
Adult ego state is you thinking, feeling and behaving in the here and now
appropriately to any stimulus.
E.g.:
Feeling angry with a person who deliberately is blocking your view of a film,
then assertively asking him to move, and if he refuses asking the steward to
deal with the matter.
When
we are in our Adult ego state we are in full contact with and are responding to
the here and now. For example happily and excitedly creating new ways of enjoying
being with our partner.
Berne
called this state of the self the neo-psyche, the new self... however he also
used the simple term of Adult!
The second order
structure of the Adult, called by Berne the Integrated Adult... this is
sometimes used to describe the functional model...
When
I am responding in the here and now, and it is appropriate to be parent-like or
child-like or grown up-like then it can be seen that we may behave from one of
the three ego states in the here and now.
When
we do this it might well be that we are deliberately drawing on material we
have within our archaic Parent or Child ego states.
CHILD EGO STATES
Whenever
we are in a situation we may re-experience feelings or thinking and behave in
ways which are similar to how we have responded in the past to similar
situations.
By
responding in this way to the here and now we are using archaic internal
experiences to determine our current thinking, feeling and behaviours; this is
a Child ego state.
It
is as if we are being an echo of ourselves from an early period of time.
The second order
structure of the Child ego state, is that in which the early echo of ourselves
already has an early version of an introjected Parent, (P1), and also an echo
of an even earlier version of the self (C1). The early Child also had an Adult
ego state... this often gets referred to as the Little Professor!
Berne
(Transactional Analysis in Psychotherapy - 1961) describes each day as an ego
state unit and that we build a series of Child ego states. He described a stack
of pennies to illustrate how these can build up. Or, one can think of the rings
of a tree; each day a new ego state is developed and tomorrow that ego state
will be the latest child ego state to have been developed.
Transactional
Analysts therefore analyze people’s Child ego states by the way a person
responds to the here and now as if it were an event from the past. E.g. A man
becomes fearful when his wife is late home from work and after ten minutes is
feeling scared, just like he did when he was a child of four and his mother
failed to arrive on time to pick him up from school. The man is not aware of
the connection unless it is pointed out to him.
Berne
called the Child ego state the archeo - psyche.
These
are borrowed archaic relics from our past, however these are not internal experiences
as the Child ego states are. These are introjected
relics.
When
we were little, we introjected (swallowed whole) an image of our parent figures.
Now in some situations we may respond as if we were the parent figure rather
than responding directly to the situation. E.g.
The
mother of the man in the above example shouted at him and told him he was
silly, she was frequently late. He now has a child at school and he frequently
turns up late to pick the child up from school telling him he is silly if he is
worried. When we are responding as if we were one of our parent figures then we
are in a Parent ego state and we are borrowing their old way of being.
Within our Parent ego
states there remains the Parent, Adult, and Child of our introjected parents...
These are represented as three ego states within the Parent ego state.
Contaminated Adult...
This is a popular model, and yet does not really fit accurately with the structural model of TA... the ego states are drawn overlapping, and the person believes they are functioning in their Adult, whereas they are acting out of their Child or Parent.... Usually there is a double contamination... with both Parent and Child beliefs distorting the reality.
FUNCTIONAL MODEL = ‘Behaving like a...’
·
Nurturing Parent warm, loving, comforting, caring, and stroking; giving permissions.
This is the OK Nurturing Parent. CAN BE: over protective, rescuing, and smothering.
i.e.; the not-OK Nurturing Parent.
·
Critical or Controlling Parent: protective, setting limits, defining values and
reality. (The OK Controlling Parent.) CAN
BE: critical, punishing, discounting and persecutory. (The not-OK
Controlling Parent.)
·
Child:
Functionally the child is split between the Adapted and Free Child or Natural
Child.
The Free Child is the source of energy for
creativity, spontaneity, and intuition. The Free Child is being as I want to
be. This can be both Ok and in some situations not Ok.
The Adapted Child is the learned adapted ways of
surviving, the best the child could develop in order to survive. Adapting
either by conforming or by rebelling against the Parent rules and expectations.
Adapted Child can also be Ok or not Ok, e.g. saying thank you for a present is
an Ok Adapted Child response.
TRANSFERENCE
Reacting in the here and now as if to archaic events. This is an
attempt to resolve the uncompleted business from the past and so heal the hurt
child, not a simple desire to replay old events in order to get kicked yet
again.
One of the great things Berne did for psychotherapy is make it
simple to understand and analyse transference relationships in the here and
now.
·
If a client responds to a therapist from either a Child ego state
or from a Parent ego state then you know that the client is inviting a
transferrential relationship with the therapist.
·
If the therapist is coming from Parent or Child then this is
therapist transference or counter transference.
The process is:-
As a child, the child introjected his/her parent figures; in the
here and now those introjects are projected out onto a screen in front of the
transferential object (in therapy the therapist or other group member) and the
client then responds as if this projected image is the reality.
Berne clearly states that scripts are a transference phenomena, and
also games are, as the pay off is script reinforcing. (See the pages on scripts
and games).
TYPES OF TRANSFERENCE:
CONCORDANT: in which the therapist feels how the client feels.
COMPLIMENTARY: in which the therapist responds in a complimentary
way to the client’s transference.
Transference can be client or therapist in origin and so can
counter transference ... E.g.:
·
The client is agitating and feeling scared - the therapist is seen
as an angry Parent figure. (Client transference).
·
Complimentary counter transference might be demonstrated by the
therapist either getting angry with the client for agitating, or by deliberately
using the transferential invitation by giving a corrective response “Do you
want to be taken care of"
·
Alternatively the therapist may analyse the transaction by inviting
the client to consider which ego state they are in, thus inviting the client into
Adult and so clarifying what is the here and now reality.
EGO GRAMS
An
Ego gram depicts the amount of energy spent in each of the functional ego
states.
Jack
Dusay hypothesized that there was always a consistent amount of energy
available to an individual, and if you increased the amount of energy used in
one ego state then the amount of energy used in the other ego states was
reduced. He uses the functional model of ego states to draw this in chart form
in ego grams.
1 )
Look at the whole of your life.
2)
This will demonstrate areas which need to be worked on during therapy. This can
be done with a group of people who know you well and then their Ego gram of you
can be compared with your own.
TRANSACTIONS:
Transactions.... TA Proper:- The analysis of
transactions between two people forms theory in practice.... once the concept
of ego states is understood, what follows
is the understanding of transactions...
Which
ego states are people using when transacting with each other?
There
are three types of transactions and many variations within each of the three
types.
Complementary
transactions:
·
Where
the ego state responding is complimentary to the ego state offering the
stimulus... when drawn the vectors indicating the transaction are parallel.
·
Communication
first
rule is ... communication will continue if the transactions are complementary!
Adult : Adult
complimentary transaction.
Crossed
Transactions:
·
Where
the vectors crossed.
·
When
the ego state addressed is different for the one responding the communication
ceases. This is the second rule of communication.
The Parent to Child stimulus is crossed with an Adult response.
Ulterior
Transactions:
·
There
is a social and an ulterior level transaction.
·
The
social level is the socially acceptable stimulus... eg., do you know what time
it is??
·
The
ulterior level can be either implying:
·
Parent
> Child ... "You stupid boy, you are late!"
·
Child
> Parent... "Please don't be cross, I did my best to get it finished on
time"
·
The
meaning will be made clear to the receiver by the use of non-verbal language
clues... a wagging finger for example along with a stern look will usually mean
a Parent > Child ulterior.
·
The
meaning
of the communication will always be at the ulterior level, this is the third
rule of communication.
·
Ulterior
transactions can be crossed or complimentary...
The ulterior
transaction is shown as a broken line in the transactional diagram.
·
Ulterior
transactions are by definition out of the person’s awareness... it is an
unconscious process.
·
All
transactions which include a Parent or Child are transferential transactions!
DISCOUNTS:
Discounts are an internal mechanism by which people minimize or maximize an aspect of reality, themselves or others. In other words they are not accounting for the reality of themselves or others or the situation. The king and his friends were discounting when, in
reality, the King really was in the “altogether". Discounting involves thinking which is
inconsistent or distorts reality. In structural terms the ego states involved will
be either Parent or Child NB: Disturbed / psychotic people are discounting
more severely... over 80% of transactions being discounted may well mean that
the person involved is psychotic! MANIFESTATIONS OF DISCOUNTING As discounts are an internal process, they can
only be ‘seen’ as it were by their external manifestations. These are: ·
Ulterior transactions. E.g. Redefining transactions where the reply
does not match the stimulus. “What time is it?”.. “It is snowing!” ·
Behaviour in a position within the Drama Triangle. ·
Passive behaviours. These may have much energy involved, but they are
passive in the sense that they will never solve the problem! 1. Doing nothing 2. Agitation 3.
Over adaptation 4.
Violence: towards self or others. Whereas strokes are essential to life, discounts
are life destructive. Games and Rackets start with, and are maintained by,
discounts, therefore if you stop the discount, you stop the Game or the
Racket. LEVELS OF
DISCOUNTING 1)
The EXISTENCE of a problem, e.g. a baby cries and the parents go to sleep. 2)
The SIGNIFICANCE of a problem “Oh the baby always cries at this time”. 3)
The CHANGE POSSIBILITIES “The baby will never be satisfied”. 4) The PERSONAL ABILITY to actually carry out the change “You could, but I can’t, change the nappy”. At each level the discount can be of three types: 1)
The STIMULUS can be discounted. 2) The
PROBLEM can be discounted. 3)
The OPTIONS can be discounted. Using the levels and types of discount, the
Discount Matrix was developed. by Mellor and Schiff... TAJ July 1975. (See end of notes, pg 16, for diagram and process)
[This is useful for diagnosing where the person is stuck and also can be used
to help in problem solving.] |
|
LIFE SCRIPTS:
A script is a personal life plan which an individual decides on early in life, and it is based upon his or her interpretation of the external and internal events which affect them.
The
script is a decisional model - this is very important - if I chose my own
script then at any time, given the right circumstances I can choose to make a
change in my script. (When this change takes place in TA therapy the client is
said to have made a Re-decision.)
A
potential script decision is made when a person discounts his own free child
needs in order to survive. Only after several discount repetitions does the
decision become part of the script unless the situation carried a great deal of
significance such as the death of a parent or sibling.
Script
Decisions are the best the child can manage in the circumstances. Yesterday’s
best choice made by the child in a land of giants may now be very limiting to
the grown adult. People follow their script because of the pay off, a familiar
feeling, attempting to avoid the loss of love or in an attempt to gain love.
SCRIPT MESSAGES come from:
1) MODELLING
-by parents, siblings, others demonstrating “how to” programs (accepted Adult messages).
2) ATTRIBUTIONS
- the big person in Parent defining the little person in some way, e.g.
“You’re just like .....”.
3) SUGGESTIONS
- indirectly given the message from parent, e.g. “Keep at it until it’s
right”. (Be Perfect).
4) INJUNCTIONS
- from the child ego state making demands on the person, either DO or DON’T.
NB:
Script messages can frequently contradict each other.
DRIVERS (Described by Taibi Kahler) From the Parent Ego State stating that the
child will be OK if he/she follows a message which says:-
You will be OK if you..... Try Hard - Be Strong - Hurry
Up - Be Perfect - Please Me –
TWELVE INJUNCTIONS (Described by Gouldings
“Changing Lives Through Re-decision Therapy”). [Injunctions come from the
infant’s parent’s scared or angry Child ego state]:-
Don’t be, Don’t be you,
Don’t, Don’t be Important, Don’t belong, Don’t be close, Don’t be well / sane,
Don’t think, Don’t feel, Don’t be a child, Don’t grow, Don’t succeed.
It
is important to note that the child responds to these injunctions and makes a
script decision... It is these negative script decisions which will possibly be
causing difficulty as a grown up.
Permissions
are also given to the child, these will be the opposite to the injunctions [see
Ulterior Transactions –pg 9] e.g. Do think, etc. The script can be elicited in
various ways, the questionnaire (see pg 12) being one, and it is drawn out on a
script matrix.
The
matrix is one of the earliest pieces of work done as a Transactional Analyst.
The analyst will then design interventions based upon the information within
the matrix.
In therapy the injunctions are always to be
dealt with first rather than Drivers which may well be the thing that keeps the
person going. [Note that Drivers are Counter-Injunctions] E.g.
"I
will be perfect then I can live." -- No matter how tempted don’t invite
this person to stop being perfect, until they have made a decision to live
regardless of how imperfect they are!
The OK Corral:
One
of Berne's best known concepts is the idea that folks are born OK, The phrase I
am OK - You are OK has become a part of folk language...
In
infancy, often pre-verbally the infant will make a decision as to how they
related to others and themselves ... This is called their existential life
position.
Early
life experiences will determine the person’s Existential or Life position. Once
decided upon, the Life Position influences how the person thinks, feels and
behaves.
There
are four basic life positions and Frank Ernst developed these into the well
known OK Corral.
I am not Ok with me You are Ok
with me |
I am Ok with
me You are Ok
with me |
I am not Ok
with me You are not
Ok with me |
I am Ok with
me You are not Ok
with me |
WORKING WITH A FAIRY STORY is
one of the ways of making a re-decision in therapy or at any other time.
The
following stories were told by a 42 year old lady who had worked the land most of
life but now works hard in a factory. She had a tragic script in which she had
planned to die at the age of 48, having already written her farewell note and
will. Early on in my work with her she described herself as a person who was
frozen in her relationship with others. She went on to tell me her favourite
fairy story was the little matchstick girl, often told her as an infant.
THE LITTLE MATCHSTICK GIRL
One
Christmas Eve there was a little girl who was trying to sell her matches, but
everyone was too busy getting ready for Christmas, and so did not want her
matches.
As
the day got colder and turned into night she had not sold a single match, so
she had no money to buy any food. She found a corner to shelter from the wind
and snow, but she was getting colder. She struck all her matches one by one to
get what warmth she could, but they soon ran out, so she tried to get to sleep.
The
next morning a little boy went out to play on his new sledge and found her
frozen to death.
NEW ENDING The client struggled for some time with writing a
new ending to the story... however she eventually did do so... this became a
turning point in her life. She had made a re-decision to live into old age.
The
new ending:
As
she was about to light her last match a little old lady came to her to buy her
matches. As it was her last one, the girl said that she could take it, the
money would not be enough to buy her food. However, the old lady was alone and
so she asked the girl to come home with her to keep her company. The old lady
found the girl a good worker and they became good companions. A few years later
the girl met a nice young man and they got married, had three boys, and lived
happily ever after.
PS: Even with this new ending you might be able to see there are still elements which in an ideal world we may want to change... However this new ending did fit with the client’s experience of life, she did and always had worked hard in order to survive financially.
These questions are designed to gain information from the client which enables the therapist to construct a script matrix, a picture of both the messages which were passed onto the infant and the decisions which the infant made.
1.
Imagine your mother sitting front of you and saying: “I am happy with you when
you .....”
2.
Do the same for your father.
3.
When you were little, what was it about you that most upset or scared your
mother?
4.
When your mother lets you know that she does not like you being like this, what
do you feel?
5. What
do you do when you feel like this?
6.
What was it about you that most upset or scared your father?
7.
How do you feel when he lets you know this?
8.
What do you do when you feel like this?
9.
What phrase or sentence describes your mother and her life best?
10.
What phrase or sentence describes your dad and his life best?
The Script Matrix (from Claude Steiner (1974) Scripts people Live)
In the above diagram I deliberately have called them mother and father power in
order to reflect
their power imbalance over their infant. The Infant makes decisions in response to each of the
messages:
·
D
= Driver messages (Often called counter injunction)
·
P
= Programme (How to's...)
·
I
= Injunction (Don'ts, or script messages)
GAMES:
A SIMPLE WAY TO EXPLORE THE
GAMES AND RACKETEERING YOU PLAY:
1)
What is it that happens over and over again?
2)
How does it start?
3)
Then what happens?
4)
What happens next?
5)
How does it end?
6)
How do you feel when it ends?
7)
How may the others feel when it ends?
A
game is a series of complimentary ulterior transactions followed by one of the
players switching ego states, leading to a moment of confusion, followed by
familiar feelings and thoughts which reinforce the players life script.
Games are a way of exchanging high value strokes, and often beget what are called Dramas, a mini version of the life script.
Games
are a way of both avoiding intimacy and are often a way of attempting to gain
intimacy.... they have advantages and disadvantages!
If
two people are involved in a process which involves exchanging ulterior
complimentary transactions but neither switch ego states then they can be said
to be Racketeering.
Racketeering is a process of exchanging
familiar and safe strokes from a familiar role... two parties can continue this
for a life time!
The
married couple never face up to their need for intimacy, instead they get along
fine, both never addressing their underlying fears that the other may one day
leave them. Every night they go through the same routine, she cooks, he washes
up, they watch TV and don't ever talk, both avoiding their deep feelings of
loneliness.
If
they do attempt to talk they fear the other may get upset, but never check this
out; they decide to take the familiar route to the TV.
To
move into intimacy one of them will have to risk breaking the familiar
pattern.... at that point intimacy is possible, however, due to fear it is also
possible that a game may ensue.
As
the other party fears abandonment and so escalates their fears into an argument
which does not address their fears, but the consequence is that the first
person retreats to the familiar pattern, and a return to the racketeering.
Rackets is
a term used for familiar feelings which are acceptable to the script and yet which
may not be the authentic feeling associated with any situation.
As
one client said recently to me: I will see the person who I want to be my lover
again tonight; I fear her, I fear losing contact with her, but that is not
acceptable so I giggle and act as if I am shy... I actually feel embarrassed...
and end up apologizing for my blushes. She laughs and I feel even more
inadequate.
1) The Karpman Drama Triangle.
Steve
Karpman one of Berne's colleagues was writing in the Transactional Analysis
Bulletin (1966) about how drama roles get acted out within fairy stories, and
he drew what has become perhaps the best known diagram from TA. I have seen it
within a health promotion booklet, and within a Gestalt book, neither crediting
Karpman nor TA!
In
a game the players start in their familiar favored position; when one of the
players switches roles the game is completed.
This
above simple diagram demonstrates how we occupy one of three roles:
VICTIM:
Hopeless, helpless, and powerless, beyond the reality. “You can make me feel
bad or good”.
RESCUER: Appear nice and helpful. “I can make you feel good”.
A
person is rescuing when he/she:
·
Is
doing something he doesn’t want to do
·
Is
doing something he was not asked to do
·
Is
doing something he can’t do
·
Is
doing more than 50% of the work
·
Is
not asking for what he wants
PERSECUTOR: “I can make you feel bad”.
People frequently take up
the persecutor role in order to avoid being the victim.
2) Transactional Analysis of
The Game
This
illustrates the ulterior transactions taking place.
3) The Formula ‘G’
Berne,
in his book ‘What Do You Say After You Say Hello’ says that only transactions
which fit this game formula are games, and any other series of transactions are
not games.
Con
+ Gimmick = Response > Switch > Cross up > Pay off
Con
= the hook which invites the person into the game, E.g. “Please help me”.
Gimmick
= the interest in the hook. E.g. “Oh yes, I’m a good helper”.
Response
= there may be several rounds of racketeering involved with the hook and
gimmick, but the problem is not solved.
Switch
= the first and second person switch ego state and position on the drama
Triangle.
Cross
up = the immediate sense of unease when the person realizes the fact that they
have been had.
Pay
Off = always enhances the script, and original life position. When working to
resolve games discover why the person is playing the game and invite them to
get their needs met in a straight way. That is without the ulterior
transactions.
Names of and degrees of
Games
Berne
named many games, most of these could be summed up as either Kick me or Kick
you, and Possibly kick them... A classic example is where a husband complains
to his wife that if it were not for her then he could.....
That
game is a "If it were not for you game." The competition is to see
who is going to get kicked... both players will play from their favoured life
position of being either one down and getting kicked or one up and kicking the other.
Each
game reinforces the script and life positions of the players; these outcomes
are described as a first, second or third degree pay off.
A
first degree pay off is one which leads to amusement, along with possibly mild
embarrassment.
A
second degree pay off is where the players really do not want others to know
about it... there is shame and a desire to cover it up.
A
third degree pay off is where there is serious damage done to the players, and
ends up in court or hospital or worse.
WHY PLAY GAMES?
·
To
further the script
·
To
maintain life position on the OK Corral.
·
To
satisfy stroke needs and excitement needs.
·
To
satisfy need for time structure and to maintain predictable patterns of
behaviour.
·
Games
avoid responsibility and intimacy.
·
An important role for games is to keep others
around for strokes when the racketeering process is running out.
SIX Advantages of Games:
1.
Biological
advantage: gaining attention and stimulation, which are essential for our well
being.
2.
Existential
advantage: Confirming the life position.
3.
Internal
psychological advantage: Defending against internal fears and old unwanted
feelings.
4.
External
psychological advantage: the avoidance of a feared situation by playing the
game.
5.
Internal
social advantage: Providing players with pseudo-intimacy,
6.
External
social advantage: This is relating to the opportunity to talk with others -
outside of the game - about the game.
To stop the game confront
the Discount.
ASSESSMENTS
During
the assessment phase much good therapy can be done. However it is not directly
seen as change work until you have agreed on a contract for change and the
client has closed their escape hatches (see below).
¾Outcomes to be aimed for
(Treatment Contract)
¾Type of therapeutic
interventions (group/individual)
¾The script / Racket System,
Game analysis and other diagnostic assessments.
ESCAPE HATCHES are used to escape a person’s own responsibility, therefore, when
appropriate, clients are invited to close their escape hatches at the earliest
possible time:-
{Closing
the ESCAPE HATCHES is an important part of T. A. therapy}
1 )
Taking one’s own life, or harming oneself.
Closed
by an Adult decision “to live and take care of myself” .
2)
To act in a crazy way.
Closed
by an Adult decision to “stay sane and to keep Adult available”.
3)
To set up to become physically sick.
Closed
with an Adult decision to “take care of myself and to live a healthy life”.
4)
To harm or kill someone else.
Escape
Hatches are closed with Adult decision to “let others live and take care of
themselves”.
Usually
the closure is put “No matter how I feel, or what others do or say, I will
......”
THERAPY CONTRACT Both the TA practitioner
and the client agree stating the areas in which the client wishes to make
changes and the outcomes expected.
Contracting
questions are:
What
do you want to change?
What
specifically are you wanting to change now?
What
needs to happen for you to make this change?
What
are you willing to do in order to make this change?
How
might you sabotage yourself?
How
will you and I know when you have made the change?
How
will you reward yourself for making the change?
- - - - - - -
- - - - -
- - - - - - -
- - - - -
- -
MELLOR & SCHIFF
- DISCOUNT MATRIX (re page 10)
You start at the top left hand corner - the
existence of a stimulus.... is there a stimulus? etc...
·
Yes
there is a baby crying.
·
Does
that mean there is a problem?
·
Does
that mean the stimulus is significant?
·
Yes>
·
Are
there any options?
·
Is
the problem significant?
·
Is
it possible to change the stimulus?
·
Yes>
·
Can
you react differently?
·
is
it possible to change the problem?
·
Are
the options significant?
·
Yes>
·
Can
you solve the problem?
·
Are
the options viable?
·
Yes>
·
Will
you act to solve the problem?
·
Yes>
There is no discount in the above situation.
Wherever the answer is no... is the area in which the
discount is occurring, and that area needs addressing in therapy.
Clearly, the earlier the no occurs in the matrix
the more serious the discount... if they don't even hear the baby crying then
there is a very serious denial of reality!
Notes source
– http://www.ta-psychotherapy.co.uk/101notes
Further
Study notes / Concepts from “What Do You Say After You Say Hello?” :
Trading
Stamps are feelings “collected” as a by-product payoff by the Child as the
Adult carries on its business – its transaction, game or racket – e.g. feelings
such as hurts, angers, guilts, fears, etc – which are subsequently “cashed”
when sufficiently accumulated to warrant a desired action, e.g. a “free”
adultery, drunk, crazy, suicide, irresponsibility, homicide, termination of
relationship, etc. Some people learn that psychological trading stamps are not
really free, and that the collected feelings have to be paid for in loneliness,
insomnia, raised blood pressure, stomach trouble and so they stop collecting
them. Others may learn but continue to collect so as to experience and expend
their vitality, and because otherwise their lives would be too drab. Some
people (e.g. paranoids) collect “counterfeit” stamps – if no one will provoke
them, they imagine provocations. “Forgiveness” often means only putting one’s
accumulated stamps away in a drawer, rather than seeing them as irrelevant and
disposing of them permanently; they will stay in the drawer as long as things
go smoothly, but if there is a new offense, they will be pulled out and added
to the new payoff in calculating the prize.
Reach-back,
After-burn and Overlap:
Reach-back –the period of time during which an impending event
influences behavior.
After-burn - the period of
time before a past event is assimilated.
Overlap - when
reach-back begins before a prior after-burn has subsided.
Electrode:
The
Parent in the Child. When activated, it brings about an almost automatic
response.
Permissions:
(1) A parental license for autonomous
behavior.
(2)
An intervention which gives the individual a license to disobey a parental injunction if he is ready, willing and
able, or releases him from parental provocations.
Re-Parenting:
Cutting
off early Parental programming and substituting a new and more adaptive program
through regression {especially effective in schizophrenics}.
Witch
Mother: The Child ego state of a mother, which forms the Parent of her
son’s Child ego state and directs the tragic script. In a productive script
this is called the Fairy Godmother.
[Review of intervention case studies
confirm that Parental and personal ego states in their internal communications
are identical to those outlined in the Voice
Dialogue process.]
SCRIPT
SUCCESSION: One’s life script is
cast before the age of seven, subject to testing and fine-tuning during later
childhood and adolescence. The script is normally composed of imprinted
parental opposite-gender injunctions over the parental same-gender pattern.
E.g. for a son, mother’s injunctions imprint on the son those script traits
which please her – these traits are laid onto the life vehicular (maleness)
pattern copied from the son’s father. It is seen that traits thereby skip
through the generations, with the son in effect naturally ‘living’ his maternal
grandfather’s traits, and the daughter naturally ‘living’ from the internal
(electrode) script of her paternal grandmother. Same gender trait consistency
through successive generations is a consequence of intentional efforts of both
parents in deliberately ensuring appropriate imprinting injunctions {in all communicative
media, not just verbal)
Intra-Personal
Energy Dynamics: When there is a
scripted prohibition against doing something, an internal dialogue will result
whenever the person starts to do it. The internalized Parent becomes active and
says “No!” in a hard script, “Watch out!” in a threatening one, or “Why do you
want to do that?” in a soft one – usually whatever the actual parent would have
said in actual life. The energy which
the Child (remember the Child is our creative source) had mobilized to
do the action is then taken over by the Parent, and is used by him to restrain
the Child. The more energy the Child has mobilized to put into the action, the
more energetic the Parent can become by appropriating this energy. If an
outsider says: “Let him do it!”, the Parent becomes alarmed, and his
prohibitions become even more energetic, so that the Child alone does not have
a chance. The outsider, however, can seduce the Child by supplying “energy” in
the form of encouragement or pressure. The Child may then go ahead and defy the
prohibition. But afterwards the Parent, still active and energetic, moves in
and causes the “hangover” phenomenon, guilt feelings, and manic-depressive
depression following too much Child freedom.
This is the state of affairs with a
weakly “cathected” or inactive Adult. In fact, the Adult is the only force
which can effectively intervene between the Parent and the Child, and all
therapeutic interventions must take account of that. It appears the Adult can
get permission from the outside (logic and reason) to mobilize its own energy,
or can be charged from an outside source. It is then in a position to intercede
between Parent and Child. It takes on the Parent, thus leaving the Child free
to go ahead. If the Parent later objects, the Adult remains “cathected” and can
oppose him.
The relationship between the Parent and
the Child also applies in reverse. Not only can the Parent grab energy from the
Child to oppose it, but it can transfer energy to the Child to goad it on. Thus
a “bad” Parent makes a “bad” Child not only by directing, but also by
energizing the child to do “bad” things. This is well known to former
schizophrenics who have been cured through re-parenting, wherein the Adult also
performs its function by getting turned on enough to argue with the discarded
Parent should it become active again.
Hence, in therapy the decisive factor is
to hook the patient’s Adult first. If the therapist and the Adult can agree and
form an alliance, this alliance can be used against the Parent to give the
Child permission: either to do something forbidden, or to disobey a Parental
provocation. After the crisis is over, the Child still has to confront a fully
charged Parent. In the case of a positive permission (You may have an orgasm
with your husband if you want to.”), the Child may be drained of energy and too
weak to resist the punishing Parent. After a negative permission (“You don’t
have to get drunk to prove you’re a man.”), the Child is tense and edgy and
perhaps resentful against whomever gave the permission to resist. In this
frustrated and vulnerable state, he has no defense against the Parent’s taunts.
In both cases, this is the point at which the therapist must be available to
protect the Child against the Parent’s retribution or jeers. [The Three P’s of
therapy – the therapist’s potency, permission and protection.]
Keith and Marnie
Elliott’s “REMEDY” Site
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